The absence of "I Love You"...

I think that is the hardest part right now.
I mean, I know the worst is yet to come...

Telling the kids
Figuring out next steps
Life without my husband
Dealing as a broken family...
That will all be more difficult than I can even dare to fathom.

But right now the absence of "I love you" leaves the most painful sting.

We have had a few disagreements when those words have been left out.
More to hurt than anything...

I am a believer that you should never turn your lights out on a day without those words.
My closing in all things...emails, texts, phone calls, goodbyes.
There they are, just three little words, not much significance
Until you place them together.

Until they are missing.

Sadly, now missing, they have posed more significance  than when they were.
The love has likely been missing for a while...
And this reality is heart wrenching.

What happened to "I will always Love you"
What happened?